Just Not Wired That Way
by DaughterOfStarlight
Summary: Amy and the Doctor steal a moment after his speech at Stonhenge, and he manages, of course, to remain fairly oblivious to a few fairly obvious facts. River steps in and shares a secret with Amy. Oneshot. Amy/Doctor,  rated K. Reviews are my lifeblood.


**Hello my freaky darlings! Help a budding writer out and give my story a read. This happens right in the middle of 'The Pandorica Opens' and it's just a bit that popped into my head while trying to fall asleep in a hspital. It is now two AM and I've accomplished little sleep but much in the way of writing. I hope you enjoy, and may you suceed in all your literary endeavors.**

**DISCLAIMER: Doctor Who and it's affiliates do not (tears) belong to me. And if any of you catch the breif Alice refrence or the X-files refrence, they also dont belong to me and probably dont belong in a Doctor Who fic. Oh well!**

**And remember! Karma lovers reviewers ;)**

She stood there watching him, a thin blanket wrapped around her shoulders as she leaned against one of the rough-hewn monoliths forming Stonehenge. There he was, fearsome and determined, shouting dark promises to the stars and brandishing his walkie-talkie like it could save all their lives. Heedless of the tens of thousands of battleships hovering just overhead, he was still convinced he could beat then into submission with well-chosen words. Or at least, strike fear into the heart of the Enemy.

Amy, strangely, wasn't much fazed by the Roman soldiers bustling about, but that's what came from travelling with The Doctor. Strange civilizations, time periods and planets not your own? Amy took that with her morning tea nowadays. All because of one strange, wonderful, confusing, brilliant, infuriating, inhuman yet utterly humane man. She had had her smittem moments, yes, but she liked to think she was past all that sappy schoolgirl rubbish. But as she watched him, a force of nature, an untamed power of unknown origion, she felt adoration swell in her chest and she wasn't so sure anymore.

His speech finished with a vibrant flourish, the Doctor hinted at a smile as the fleets of artillery ships converged around Stonehenge retreated farther into darkness. Tossing the walkie-talke to a soldier, the Doctor hopped off his rock and brushed past Amy with a grin.

"That should hold them for a bit, eh?"

She pivoted on her heel and followed him, knowing full well that he hardly ever stopped moving, even at rest.

"Have they gone?"

"What? Oh no no, most definitely not. They're just lurking about in the high atmosphere, bickering about who should shoot at me first."

"Lovely," Amy said, rolling her eyes.

The Doctor began to nonchalantly sonic a few patches of suspicious-looking grass.

"Well better me than you, eh Pond?"

"I'd prefer no one shooting at anyone at all. You promised me Rio, Doctor."

"I took you to Rio, Amy, it was lovely. The nice people gave us all those plastic beads, remember?"

"That was Mardi Gras in New Orleans, which was loads of fun, don't get me wrong, but still not Rio."

"Picky picky Pond," The Doctor muttered, heading back towards the shaft which led down into the chamber housing the Pandorica. "Well go to Rio once we save the Universe, I promise you."

Amy tossed off her blanket, cutting him off before he could disappear into the heart of the Earth.

"That's what I'm trying to tell you, Doctor. The stakes are high here, and I don't want you getting hurt."

"Getting hurt? Amy, there are entire planets devoted to my eradication; 'getting hurt' is in the job description."

"I know!" She said, trying not to stumble over her words. "And that's okay if you're you, you being…the way you are and such, which is perfectly fine. But for me, because I'm with you, you know, in the travelling sense, and then we get pulled into these things and I see you and I just wonder…"

"Open your mouth and stick out your tongue."

"I just wonder about…Wait. What?

"Open your mouth and stick out your tongue," The Doctor repeated calmly, running his fingers through his untamable mop of hair. Amy narrowed her eyes.

"You're madder than a box of frogs."

"Just do it, Pond."

Amy sighed but obliged, even saying 'ah' for good measure. The Doctor peered in her mouth with the light from the sonic a few times, then flashed it in her eyes until she saw spots, but eventually put it away.

"No signs of an infection," He muttered. "But you're starting to show those symptoms again."

"What symptoms?"

He ticked then off his fingers. "The stammering out sentences that make no sense, being all red and blushy all the time, reading literature of a romantic nature (which is very, extremely dangerous, I might add) and the lack of sleep at night, as though something is on your mind. You're doing it again, Pond, and to be frank you have me baffled as to the cause."

Amy blinked. Two thoughts flashed through her mind: 1- Was it really that obvious? And 2- Was he really that clueless.?

She glanced around, found the soldiers otherwise occupied, but lowered her voice just in case.

"Doctor…Don't you understand?"

"I rarely do, Amy. Even when I say I do."

She sighed, taking a step closer to him. Of course, she had to be in love with the one being in the Universe who refused to take a hint.

"I…Care about you Doctor. Despite the fact that I have relatively no idea who you are, what you have been like or what you're even like now, despite the fact that I don't even know your name…"

"Oh, what does it matter? You humans and your 'names'..."

She set her hand on the side of his face, looking up into his infinitely ancient but eternally young eyes. "It matters to me, lummox. Will you ever tell me?"

He gave her a wicked lopsided grin. "Maybe when you're older."

She couldn't help herself. She had behaved herself up until this point but she was done pretending. She stood on her tiptoes and leaned into kiss him.

Her mouth barely grazed his own, a whisper of what might was been, before he took a step back and laid a finger aside of her lips.

"Amy, we've been over this…" His voice was suddenly very quiet and devoid of all it's usual humor.

"I know," Amy mumbled feeling a mixture of embarrassment and despair.

"I don't...work that way..."

"I know. I'm sorry."

He looked at her, almost in the way a small child looks at a much older person to figure out what makes them tick.

"But I suppose you don't work in any other sort of way, do you?"

A little smile played at the corners of her mouth. "I suppose not."

The Doctor thought on this for a moment before announcing,

"Amy Pond, we need to find you a fellow. Perhaps in Rio. Which of course comes after saving the Universe. Which of course comes after figuring out what in the name of Gallifrey is in that box and how we keep it there." He turned from her and promptly disappeared underground. "Come on, Pond, we've got work to do!"

She gave a bittersweet smile, still impressed by how unimpressionable he was. Just as she was lowering herself onto the ancient staircase that led to the Pandorica, she heard a silky voice behind her.

"He's something else, isn't he? You could tell him a thousand times in a thousand lifetimes, but he still never quite _gets_ it."

Amy spun around to find a feline face framed by wild blonde crimps.

"River," The Scott said flatly. "How long have you been standing there?"

The veteran time traveler strolled forward languidly. "Oh, long enough to see your little Mulder/Scully moment. Nothing more painful than an almost-kiss, is there chickie?"

The X-Files reference went right over Amy's head but she didn't have to catch it to understand that River was mocking her. The red-head scowled, feeling her face flush with angry embarrassment.

"It's none of your business, River. Just a…weird moment. Nothing irreversible."

"Oh, nut nothing uncommon either."

Amy, who was halfway down the hole, halted in her progress once again.

"What are you talking about?"

River song took a few steps forward, fingering her blaster somewhat uncomfortably.

"Over the years that Doctor has, unintentionally I'm sure…Left a string of broken hearts in his wake. It's a rare woman who can get close to him without fancying him at least a bit, I think."

"…And you speak from personal experience?"

River sighed, sitting down on the edge of the hole. She had the weary smile of a veteran on her face.

"After a while you learn to stop hoping for certain things. Start seeing things a bit more his way. And then you just sort of forget that spark was ever there until, one day, something reignites it."

"And it hurts like a scar being ripped open anew," Amy finished. "Wait." She look scrutinizingly at River. "Why are you telling me this? Or being nice to me at all?"

River shrugged, pursing her lips. "Who knows? This could be the eve of our destruction. Why not?"

"Indeed."

Suddenly a harried but all-too familiar voice sounded from inside the earth, accompanied by the indistinct whirring of a sonic screwdriver.

"AMY, RIVER! Little help, please?"

Amy sighed. "Duty calls."

River smirked, following her down the hole. "Indeed. Duty calls."

**Remember my lovelies, every time you dont review, a fairy somewhere falls down dead. True story ;)**


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